How to make money and (still) be a nice person
If you are really wealthy, don’t read this blog. 🙂
I was reading an article that James Hillman wrote “A contribution to soul and money”. He says lots of interesting things in it, but what struck me as most interesting is the idea that money = psyche.
Money is an Archetype which is translated into psychic energy. This psychic energy is limited, so it can only be used by the ego for either external (conscious) development, i.e. manifesting money or internal (unconscious) development of the soul. In our society, money is not the property of the spiritual man. If you have money, you will be spiritually lacking. If you are spiritual, you will lack in money.
The conscious position
When our daughter was small, Stephen and I had a business that went bust. During one December there was no food, only peanut butter sandwiches and no presents under the tree.
Luckily, we recovered and now we are doing ok :-).
Of course, I would love to have more! I would love the freedom of not having to budget going to the dentist.
Sometimes I buy the Powerball lotto ticket and get carried away with dreams of what I could get with all that money. I would upgrade my house, upgrade my car, upgrade my wardrobe, etc. Basically, I would become a better version of myself at the moment.
So what is the problem? Why am I not in that situation of real wealth already?
Simply this, my projection onto wealth is not positive, it is negative.
The unconscious position
My conscious position may be very positive, but unconsciously lies the truth of what I suspect I will become. And for the purposes of this example, you have to imagine the most amount of money you could have. Have you ever heard that expression “f#k you money”? That is when you have so much money that you own the bank manager and he will do ANYTHING to make you happy. And I mean anything. 🙂 You have so much money that you can buy people’s loyalty, their trust, change the very nature of reality and believe your own bullshit.
Would you still be you?
Good question, I think not.
So who is the doppelganger waiting in the shadows, ready to take control and usurp me when I have that much money and power?
It took quite a bit of digging and honesty to uncover her. I could not come up with anything, until I started thinking about images that made an impression on me during my life. I could not find any images of wealthy icons, so I widened my search and found 2 Images of power and success.
The Elfin queen Galadriel’s shadow, when she is tempted by the ring. I will never forget that scene where the ring’s power transforms her into an unstoppable powermad demon. All shall love me and despair!
The other image I have is of Madonna, in her early twenties, performing “Holiday” for American Bandstand in 1984. Afterwards, the host asked her what her dreams were and she replied “I want to rule the world”.
And after doing some more soul searching, I have realised 2 things about myself, I am a complete powerjunkie!
I want power, I want to yield it as a sword – Off with their heads! I am the mad queen who wants to be worshipped above all else. I want autocracy – total and complete. Yes, that is all in me.
On top of that, there is the slight problem with money which is this. Once I have all that stuff, what is my excuse going to be then for not being exceptional? What obstacle can I blame then? And how am I going to become exceptional and make a mark in this world? I am quite talented, but not that talented.
So this is the rub. With lots of money, comes a powerful unconscious complex which I will not be able to control. It will possess me and find expression. I can’t allow that. I don’t want to be that. I want to be good and nice and spiritual. I want to be a muse.
I also am not exceptional in any way. And with mediocrity comes a valid reason for being ordinary. No pressure.
Do you think I will ever be really wealthy?
And if you can relate to the above, keep reading.
An alternative to wanting money?
You certainly don’t need to pursue money. It does not need to be about the money at all. It can be about passion, expression of yourself, meaning etc. This way you pursue happiness in a sense.
So your work/career becomes about doing what you love to do. Whether you make money or not is then not an issue at all. And if your passion does make money, be sure that you don’t get distracted by the money, because if you change your focus, you may jeopardise your relationship with your passion. The focus must always be on the love of what you are doing.
I, for one, think this would be a very meaningful way to live your life. Not only will you contribute to society with your passion for what you do, but it will be untainted by ulterior motives and will be an inspiration for all who know you.
I also think that there is no greater gift you can give your children than this example of personal passion and fulfilment. For sure, anyone who follows this path will be sure to have a life of meaning.
And if you can’t live without it?
But what do you do if you REALLY want money/power/success?
You will have to realise that you can’t be the person you are now AND have money. You will have to change. Whatever you are projecting onto the money is what you will have to become. Are you willing to do that?
Please don’t misunderstand what I am saying. I am certainly not saying that wealthy powerful people are not nice. I am saying that to ME they are not nice. So for me to become wealthy and powerful, I will have to adopt a less than nice persona. But that is just me. There are a lot of wealthy people who are nice and maybe I can work on this neurosis until I can be nice and be super wealthy. And that is the third option. But for the moment, this is where I am at.
So there you have it, not simple but interesting. I think that finding out what you project onto money is a good start into some real internal work.
May your pockets be heavy and your heart light 🙂
Anja
Comments (4)
Thank you Anja, I enjoyed that. I can relate to much of what you say. Another issue for me is our all too human tendency for rampant consumerism – senselessly trying to fill the inner void with material objects while drying up our Mother Earth of her resources. Perhaps we can still be rich and aware of the consequences of our consumption?
But if I may play the Devil’s advocate here for the sake of stimulating introspection all around for here I feel there is a deeper difficulty that many of us struggle with – and that is this idea that we must be “nice”. It seems that for many of us we are polarized between consciously (at least seemingly so) playing “nice” and an unconscious, suppressed “control freak” (or vice versa) and have not yet transcended this polarity into a state of true power – the confidence of simply being who we are. I imagine that some shudder at the use of that word – “power”. There is an author who has painted a useful picture for us here:
“Our deepest fear is not that we are inadequate. Our deepest fear is that we are powerful beyond measure. It is our light, not our darkness that most frightens us. We ask ourselves, ‘Who am I to be brilliant, gorgeous, talented, fabulous?’ Actually, who are you not to be? You are a child of God. Your playing small does not serve the world. There is nothing enlightened about shrinking so that other people won’t feel insecure around you. We are all meant to shine, as children do. We were born to make manifest the glory of God that is within us. It’s not just in some of us; it’s in everyone. And as we let our own light shine, we unconsciously give other people permission to do the same. As we are liberated from our own fear, our presence automatically liberates others.” ― Marianne Williamson, Return to Love
I would like to know what a wealthy person thinks of this blog. Why do you wish to exclude their viewpoint.
money = psyche: >>> I take it that psyche means the entire mind – how does this relate to psychic energy? This seems a bit far-fetched to me. Money is simply paper with value. What we DO to make it part of our daily reality is what can be worked on. Our own values give money value or conversely, devalue it.
Abundance on a soul level and true physical abundance? >>>Cant you have both? I think this is limited thinking. I bought into that belief for too long.
You say that “In our society, money is not the property of the spiritual man. If you have money, you will be spiritually lacking. If you are spiritual, you will lack in money.” >>> Ahem, I hope this is said tongue in cheek.
“Luckily, we recovered and now we are doing ok .” >>> Doing ok means that you’re not doing well. There’s holdback in this. If this is so, then, according to others’ values, I am doing very badly. I could feel bad about it but realise that this would hold me back, stop me. I choose to simply say to myself: “Congratulations for what you are achieving – you work hard and you give a great class where people like what you do and have been coming to you for years. And while I think about it, why not get these longstanding clients to write up a referral for you.”
“Sometimes I buy the Powerball lotto ticket and get carried away with dreams of what I could get with all that money. I would upgrade my house, upgrade my car, upgrade my wardrobe, etc. Basically, I would become a better version of myself at the moment.” >>> All of the upgrades you mention do not make you a better version of yourself . You are already just wonderful as you are. This is spiritual lack. You are not less.
“So what is the problem? Why am I not in that situation of real wealth already?” >>> Possible guilt that, if you have more, you are not being spiritual.
“F&#k you money”: >>> This type of money has very limited ability to make anyone happy. Knowing that it will be something that is not true to your nature puts you off so it’s not going to happen – your getting rich with the thinking you have. Why on earth would you want to say/or do this to anyone? Cutting off someone’s tie and ner ner ner behaviour is just silly.
“So who is the doppelganger waiting in the shadows, ready to take control and usurp
me when I have that much money and power?” >>> Your doppelganger/shadow is a power crazy control freak? Isn’t there a better use of power? Why must the side of you that wants money be a baddie? It’s truly important to let others win.
“The Elfin queen Galadriel’s shadow, when she is tempted by the ring. I will never forget that scene where the ring’s power transforms her into an unstoppable powermad demon. All shall love me and despair!” >>> Good Lord! I can’t imagine a worse archetype ~ being worshipped with hatred? Why not be loved just for being who you are – with or without money.
“The other image I have is of Madonna, in her early twenties, performing “Holiday” for American Bandstand in 1984. Afterwards, the host asked her what her dreams were and she replied “I want to rule the world”. >>> I think Madonna was having a bit of fun with this. If she truly meant this, I personally do not relate – Ugh, all that responsibility. Lol! Cool though to have a bit of applause from time to time. I can however relate to her outrageous archetype ~ such fun!
“And after doing some more soul searching, I have realised 2 things about myself, I am a complete powerjunkie! “ >>> More laughter! That would be what’s holding you back. True abundance comes from knowing what the word power means. Power in its purest sense, is love, deep self regard. Do you see power as something that makes others less?
“I want power, I want to yield it as a sword – Off with their heads! I am the mad queen who wants to be worshipped above all else. I want autocracy – total and complete. Yes, that is all in me.” >>> Does this power crazy archetype serve you? Are your needs being met? If you hide her away, then you’re being good (and nice, and spiritual). I think she needs to come out and strut her stuff. Also, must she hurt and remove heads to get what she wants?
“On top of that, there is the slight problem with money which is this. Once I have all that stuff, what is my excuse going to be then for not being exceptional?” >>> Yes, you will have the ability to stand out. Is this a problem – to show?
“What obstacle can I blame then?” >>> Perhaps you can see that there will be no obstacle?? Do you need obstacles/difficulties?
“And how am I going to become exceptional and make a mark in this world?” >>> Why must you stick out and make your mark – is this like a university degree? You already are exceptional and have no need to write your name on the planet indelibly.
“I am quite talented, but not that talented.” >>>You are highly talented and have no lack in this quarter (this said without even knowing you).
“So this is the rub. With lots of money, comes a powerful unconscious complex which I will not be able to control.” >>> Hmmmm, there’s that word ‘control’ – it implies that you must have total power over this thing you don’t like (money). Why not consciously take the word ‘control’ out of your life and replace it with being “in charge.”
“It will possess me and find expression. I can’t allow that. I don’t want to be that. I want to be good and nice and spiritual. I want to be a muse.” >>> For as long as you ‘want’ in this way, you are going to stay (a)muse(d). You have tied ‘good’ and ‘nice’ and ‘being a muse’ to being spiritual but that form of spirituality has no abundance. Perhaps it’s time to re-examine why being good and nice and spiritual has a tie in to being without means. Some new neural pathways can be established to see that you can HAVE IT ALL and not be perceived as power crazy. And it’s possibly to do with this: if you are ‘seen’ to be wealthy you are also ‘seen’ as the awful power-crazy person.
“I also am not exceptional in any way. And with mediocrity comes a valid reason for being ordinary. No pressure.” >>> Has this article been written in such a way as to find the reader question their own values regarding abundance? If you do not believe you are exceptional, then how can you operate efficiently? With the premise that you’re mediocre and ordinary and feel no pressure to change this, why would your situation regarding your finances change? Why not start seeing your own self love. No blame.
“Do you think I will ever be really wealthy?” >>>Yes, when you choose to remove the veil of mediocrity from your ingrained beliefs. I wish you a very full bank account. I wish you more.
“You certainly don’t need to pursue money. It does not need to be about the money at all. It can be about passion, expression of yourself, meaning etc. This way you pursue happiness in a sense.” >>> Yes, if this is what you want.
“So your work/career becomes about doing what you love to do. Whether you make money or not is then not an issue at all.” >>> If your house is falling apart all around you and you’re not able to pay your bills and live decently, then it is an issue.
“And if your passion does make money, be sure that you don’t get distracted by the money, because if you change your focus, you may jeopardise your relationship with your passion. The focus must always be on the love of what you are doing.” >>> When the passion is on loving what you do and trusting that money will follow – that’s when you’re applying yourself to life on both levels of abundance – physical and spiritual. In my view, this is true abundance. Many however think they are following their passion and then get very stuck trying to move out of the comfort zone they’re in, even though they’re starving.
“I, for one, think this would be a very meaningful way to live your life. Not only will you contribute to society with your passion for what you do, but it will be untainted by ulterior motives and will be an inspiration for all who know you.” >>> While you may /know/ it at one level, it has not sunk down to your /actions/. This belief is ethereal until you put your thought into action. What will you DO to live meaningfully?
“I also think that there is no greater gift you can give your children than this example of personal passion and fulfilment.” >>> You may /think/ it however, what messages do you give your children and how are you showing them abundant living. This one may make you defensive. Take thought to action and ask what will I do to fulfil my passion and make good money at the same time. What are my gifts?
“For sure, anyone who follows this path will be sure to have a life of meaning.” >>> While you may think this, do you see it for yourself? Have you concretized this in your thoughts and made it reality?
But what do you do if you REALLY want money/power/success? >>> Here’s where I see a couple of questions for you:
If you really want money?>>> Why not see money as a vehicle to an easier lifestyle and not as having the car, the house, the possessions. I have no need of the fancy stuff. Those are good to have but there’s only so many Porsche’s you can put into the garage. It becomes ho-hum.
If you really want power? >>>Power in my books is the ability to utilize my money to make more in order that it gives out and never holds back. If I have pots of money I can get to visit a friend in Canada. When money is not a problem I can visit a brother in law who helped put my children through university and repay him or, if he doesn’t want it back, pay it forward. Money is currency and energetic –let it flow!
If you really want success? >>> It depends on what you see as being successful. Lots of things …or … lots of fun. I’d opt for the second one. Money in my bank account and purse means I can pursue everything I ever wanted to. It means I give up on being a yoga teacher (for a while) and take lessons from a teacher in Wyoming or Kathmandu. It means I do more with “happy” money – money acquired from a pure source and not through dubious means. I see that many ‘spiritual’ authors seem not to be able to settle down and enjoy the income they have made. They seem to be on a treadmill of being ‘seen’ to be good. Wayne Dyer comes to mind. And truly, he’s a great guy but why not sit back and enjoy the moolla you’ve made. There’s nothing more to prove. Am thinking – does Wayne Dyer need approval? And perhaps he just loves writing books about the same ol same ol’ … It’s not a bad format and it does work.
“You will have to realise that you can’t be the person you are now AND have money.” >>>If the person you are now has incorrect concepts regarding abundance, then yes, as you put it: “You will have to change.”
“Whatever you are projecting onto the money is what you will have to become. Are you willing to do that?” >>> Is there any way that you can believe that money is just money and that you are the one projecting meaning onto it?
“Please don’t misunderstand what I am saying. I am certainly not saying that wealthy powerful people are not nice. I am saying that to ME they are not nice.” >>> This is your point of power. Why hold this belief? Your children are probably taking this on as well.
“So for me to become wealthy and powerful, I will have to adopt a less than nice persona.” >>> Really? Being wealthy and powerful equates to being less than nice/not nice/awful person?
“But that is just me. There are a lot of wealthy people who are nice” >>> you have confusion here
“and maybe I can work on this neurosis until I can be nice” >>> (notice you’re saying that you’re not nice even though you’re not wealthy)
“and be super wealthy.” >>> So, this means that your ‘not nice’ persona does not like super wealthy not nice people. Are you envious of them? Have you discovered what you truly feel about super wealthy folk?What is your resistence?
“So there you have it, not simple but interesting. I think that finding out what you project onto money is a good start into some real internal work.” >>> I see money as a vehicle to getting my needs met rather than it having any power. I have my abilities and money is simply great exchange for the abilities I have. You speak of money as though it was an entity with its own powers; money is the power and you are powerless?
“May your pockets be heavy and your heart light ” >>> May you bank account fill up with unexpected sources of income. May you have serveral bank accounts and the ability to transfer money on a daily basis from one account to another. I have had unexpected sources of income appear several times in my life. Money does not have power and is there to show you your own power (love). If so many are living their lives believing that money controls them, then what are we saying about living abundantly?
Thanks for your post – when something crosses my path, I like to not only observe it, but see how it moves.
I lime the idea and possibility that money can follow passion though it does not guarantee it.
There is also that matter of how much money is enough.
It seems to me money is just another form of attachment and any such can rob one of niceness, passion, happiness, etc..
I love Anja’s self awareness and admission of bias while expressing hope of getting past it.
I also dig the one commentor’s challenge of niceness as an absolute value. While I believe love is, nice is not. And, yes, one can be loving without being nice (all the time).
A very thought provoking post, thank you. For me money means the freedom to live a totally isolated life, somewhere at the coast with Hubs, the hounds, internet, books and an awesome garden. Pretty much without much people interaction. A perfect introverted life. But the reality is different. Through my studies I’ve come to the conclusion that – in the hero’s journey and as other mythological systems and traditions teach us, we must come back with our boon to make our contribution – for the greater good.
That this contribution toward humanity, this selfless act of oneness, is our ultimate destiny. I’m not ready to do that. Selfishly I want to stamp my little (okay not so little) foot and refuse point blank. I have found this wondrous thing here in the underworld and I want to stay here. Leave me alone, everything within me shouts. I don’t want to share. Go away. And then I dream of the tiny cottage by the sea.